Waiters and restaurant servers work in a fast-paced, high-pressure environment. Their goal is to provide a positive experience for all guests while juggling multiple tables and tasks. While most diners are polite and considerate, certain common habits can make a server’s job significantly more difficult and stressful. Being aware of these habits can help you be a more mindful and appreciated customer. This often leads to better service in return. Here are seven common dining habits that can be very frustrating for your waiter.
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1. Being Unprepared When It’s Time to Order
A server’s time is their most valuable resource, especially during a busy service. When they approach your table and you’re not ready to order—still deep in conversation or having not even looked at the menu—it disrupts their flow. They then have to circle back multiple times. While it’s fine to ask for a few more minutes, try to have some idea of what you want when you signal you’re ready. This keeps the service efficient for everyone.
2. Trying to Flag Them Down When They Are Occupied
Waving your arms frantically, snapping your fingers, or calling out “Waiter!” across a busy dining room is considered rude and frustrating. Servers are trained to scan their sections constantly. They see you. If they are in the middle of taking another table’s order or carrying a heavy tray of food, they cannot come to you instantly. Make eye contact and give a slight nod or raise of your hand. A patient, respectful signal will be acknowledged as soon as they are free.
3. Making Excessive or Impossible Modifications to a Dish
While most kitchens are happy to accommodate reasonable requests and dietary restrictions, trying to completely re-engineer a menu item can be a major headache. Asking for numerous complex substitutions or subtractions on a chef-designed dish slows down the kitchen. It also increases the chances of errors. Trust the chef’s composition of the dish, or if you have many restrictions, choose a simpler item on the menu that requires less modification.
4. Letting Children Be Unsupervised or Create a Mess
It’s expected that kids will be a bit messy. However, allowing children to run around the restaurant, throw food on the floor excessively, or make a huge mess with sugar packets and crayons creates extra work and safety hazards for the staff. It’s the parents’ responsibility to keep their children reasonably contained at the table. Leaving an egregiously messy area for the server and busser to clean up is also considered poor form.
5. Camping at a Table Long After Paying on a Busy Night
Lingering for a long chat after your meal is often fine on a slow weeknight. However, occupying a table for an extended period after you’ve paid your bill on a busy Friday or Saturday night is known as “camping.” This prevents the server from “turning” the table, which means seating new guests and earning more tips. It also frustrates waiting customers. Be mindful of the restaurant’s business flow during peak hours.
6. Stacking Plates for the Server (Often Incorrectly)
Many diners think they are being helpful by stacking all their dirty plates at the end of a meal. While the intention is good, servers have a specific, systematic way of clearing a table to balance the weight and stack dishes securely for carrying. Stacking plates messily, with silverware and leftover food trapped between them, often makes the server’s job harder. They may have to unstack and restack everything. It’s best to just leave the plates as they are.
7. Asking for Separate Checks at the End of a Large Group Meal
For large groups, asking for separate checks at the end of the meal can be a server’s nightmare. It requires them to go back and try to remember who ordered what, a time-consuming and error-prone process. If your large group needs separate checks, it is crucial to inform the server at the very beginning of the meal. This allows them to keep track of orders separately from the start, making the checkout process smooth for everyone.
A Partnership in Dining
A great dining experience is a partnership between the guest and the restaurant staff. By being a mindful and considerate diner, you can help make your server’s demanding job a little easier. Simple things like being ready to order, signaling for attention respectfully, supervising children, and being aware of the time on a busy night contribute to a smoother service for everyone. This courteous behavior is always appreciated by the staff. It often results in them going the extra mile to ensure you have a wonderful meal.
If you’ve ever worked as a waiter or server, what other dining habits would you add to this list? As a diner, which of these points were you surprised by? Share your perspective!
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